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Juggling a Family, Career and Friendships

Photo credit: Unsplash

It’s hard being a mum.  Add in a job to the mix and things get much harder.

That’s me.

I work from home around the children.  It’s a daily struggle to keep on top of all the various things that need to be done.  This year I’ve faced all sorts of challenges from illnesses to trying to get my son into a local primary school, piano exam preparation, as well as all the household stuff including cleaning, laundry, cooking and keeping on top of all school events.  I should probably also mention my children are currently at 3 different schools.  My work hours are literally as and when I can find the time.

Getting me time, or time to go see friends is rare but essential for my sanity.  Of course, I feel bad as I rarely get to see friends I’ve known for years.  The problem is that by the time everything is done each day I find I’m too tired to function.  I’m sure many other parents would agree it can be difficult to juggle everything.  Often, there are areas that will be neglected.

Most of my friends work during the day so by the time they’re ready to go out, I’m ready to go to bed.  This means that unless I can get a nap in the day I will often miss social events.  I’m also not one for traveling on my own at night so going anywhere by public transport alone is out of the question.  Time passes and all of a sudden it’s been 5 months since I last saw any of them!!

There are ways to help keep friendships alive though which include:

Arranging to Meet Up In Advance

My calendar gets a lot of use.  It keeps me on track with everything that is going on.  We will all have a routine set up and gaps that will arise every so often.  I find that when a gap does come up, booking in a meetup with friends makes a worthy activity to fill the slot.  It needn’t be a full day, even a morning or afternoon will work.  Of course, then you have to cross your fingers that no emergencies come up to cause you to cancel.  It’s frustrating when last-minute cancellations occur but sometimes unavoidable.  A good friend will understand.

Remember Birthdays

Birthdays are a great excuse for a get-together.  I try to make a note on the calendar beforehand to help me remember.  If I don’t it could easily slip my mind with my busy schedule.  It’s a great opportunity to do something special or buy them something you know they’d love even if you can’t attend on the day of the party.  You could go here and send them a stunning bouquet of their favourite flowers or even gift them an experience you know they’d love.

Stay in Touch Via Text, Whatsapp, Facebook, Twitter and Email

Social media can be a good way to keep in touch.  Many share pictures on these so you can see what they’ve been up to.  A quick message via text, whatsapp, facebook, twitter or email can help you keep up to date with what you’ve all been up to.  Even a quick phone call can be a good way to let friends know you miss them/are thinking of them.

Invite Them Over!

Inviting friends over is an easy and low-cost way to arrange a meetup.  You can arrange for all to bring a dish and bottle to cover the refreshments, alternatively, all chip in and you get food delivered.

The great thing is that with real friends they’re there for life.  You don’t need to see each other all the time but the bond is there.  You may feel guilty if you’ve missed an important event but they are sure to understand.

Even if you’ve got a busy household, invite them over for a few hours.  Sometimes it works better to do this over the weekend when children are at clubs, playdates or parties.  It’s hard to chat when children are running riot.

 When we don’t get to see long-standing friends it can feel like you’ve grown apart.  This isn’t necessarily the case.  Sometimes people can spend years away and be like they’ve never been apart when they are reunited.  We must remember that our life changes and so do our priorities as we get older and gain responsibilities.  Friendships shouldn’t suffer however so staying in touch even if you can’t meet often is still important.

How do you keep in touch with friends you don’t get to see often?

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This Post Has 24 Comments

  1. I try to be really organised, and birthdays, etc. are all in my phone calendar with reminders set up, it’s hard work though!

    1. I know what you mean. I find I get clashes with so many things to keep on top of.

  2. i love nights out with the girls but find it hard nowadays as many of us now seem to have more comitments too , so i make sure i stick to going out every tuesday night with my best friend where we go to a local bingo club

    1. That sounds like fun. I used to play years ago when I was pregnant with my first child. Good to hear you have time to get out and see friends.

  3. Great article. All this just shows how easy life was when you were at school and had friendship groups on a plate with little to no personal responsibility!

    1. It’s true, life when you are younger and friendships are easier to maintain when there are no responsibilities.

  4. Sadly I have fallen foul to this very recently, my life has changed dramatically in 2 years. I’ve gone from a mum to 1, to a step mum of 2 and moved in with my partner. Add losing my Mum and having to spend additional time with my dad, plus a full time job and my blog to run, I’m struggling.

    I try my best but sadly lost a close friend along the way. I’m very sad about it but also feel that despite keeping in touch it wasn’t enough for them and I realise that maybe if they can’t appreciate all the change in my life that it’s only right it came to this x

    1. I’m sorry to hear that Claire. It sounds like you’ve had an excessive amount on your plate recently. Sometimes people grow apart especially when we have different responsibilities. It can be hard when you have so much to do and they on the flip side have far less responsibilities. Not everyone can fully understand what you are going through but I hope you still have other friendships that will last the test of time x

  5. It really is hard when we have so many hats to wear and jobs to juggle. Great tips.

    1. Thanks Kizzy. Keeping in touch can get much harder when we get older and have more to keep on top of.

  6. some sound advice here, it certainly is hard work being a mum!

    1. It sure is, but worth it 🙂

  7. It is so hard juggling everything and keeping everyone happy. We have a WhatsApp group that we regularly chat on but wish we could meet up more

    1. It really can be a struggle. Glad you keep in touch with your friends. Whatsapp is a great way to keep in touch.

  8. There are some really good tips here. Staying connected and in touch with people even if only on message is important for sure xx

    1. It is although sometimes it can be easy to forget when you’re busy.

  9. It can be difficult to allocate time to see friends when you’re busy with the family and friends, I book a cafe visit once a month.

    1. It’s great if you can set something up monthly x

  10. Juggling family life can be so isolating, especially when you are trying to arrange plans with others. Attempting to find that hour or two when you are all free to meet up etc.

    1. It really can be very isolating. I do worry about growing apart sometimes.

  11. Great advice here! Remembering birthdays is very important.

  12. I know where you are coming from. I don’t have kids and still don’t get to catch up with friends. I have realised though if you want to really meet up you will make it happen

    1. It’s hard but can be done. It isn’t always easy to juggle everything.

  13. I really struggle to see my friends now I am back to work, but am hoping we will get to catch up in the summer holidays

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